Ladies and gents, I’ve been thinking about this piece for a while. I’ve been asked and have asked people this question who knows how many times, who would you invite to your dream dinner party?
I’ve decided to narrow it down. A lot of times people give the option of guests dead or alive, but I’m going with alive only. It gives the whole thing just a little more of a sense of possibility.
I want to start with a couple of quick caveats. I love eating dinner and hanging out with my close friends. But, I am not inviting them to be a part of this dinner. I hope that they will be available for many other dinners in the future. Along the same lines I am not inviting E-ve to this dinner. I love her very much and it has nothing to do with the guests (although I would be a little worried about her getting wooed by one of them) it’s just that she’s the person that I would want to run to afterwards to tell all the stories and brag and exaggerate and just be a geek.
With those two points made, let’s get started.
The guest list is a group of 5 people plus me. In alphabetical order, here they are:
1. Kristen Bell: Actress, star of one of my favourite shows ever, Veronica Mars.
2. Bill Clinton: The 42nd President of the United States, author, speaker, philanthropist, legend.
3. Dolly Parton: Country Music Legend and Actress. Often overlooked as the writer of “I will always love you” and entrepreneur extraordinaire.
4. Cabral Richards: TV personality, interviewer, funny guy, music video actor (Money Jane, released 2000), Canadian Celebrity.
5. Kevin Smith: Director, Writer, Actor, also a funny guy, family man, personal hero.
When it comes to the location I have 2 ideas in mind, but one more prominent because of what it is. I would love to be at a cottage somewhere with lots of privacy and a big deck and the wilderness just close enough to admire. But I think that I would pick my mom’s place as option number 1. It’s a big house, with a big yard, a pond, a dog, a fire pit, a pool table in the basement and all of my old stuff kicking around in boxes. The other big thing is that I feel at home there, so hosting these people wouldn’t seem like such a task. It would be like having friends over.
As far as menu goes, without being to extreme and lavish, I have some ideas. What I will not do is cater to diets, preferences or allergies. This is a dream, and I’m not interested in doing the research that it would take to find out what everyone likes for dinner.
I’m a huge fan of appetizers. I also love cheese and pickles and bacon and I’m more than okay with having them all at the same time. So here’s what I’m thinking.
We start with some finger foods, everything laid out on trays. Dill, Sweet and Sour and Butter pickles. I told you that I love pickles. Cheddar, Swiss, Brie and Havarti cheeses. Cubed and ready to enjoy with some crackers. And that leaves us with bacon. I love bacon wrapped stuff, and I think I’ve picked my 2 choices. The first is an old stand-by that my mom introduced me to years ago, Water Chestnuts. The second is the seafood on the menu, Scallops. You take those 2 ingredients, wrap them and bacon, and throw them in the oven for a few minutes while your bacon cooks and voila. So tasty you’ll be wishing for them more often.
The main course is really just a mix of things that I love to chow down on. Since we’ll be at Mommy Z’s there’s going to be a BBQ available, so we’ll use it. I can smell Steaks and Chicken grilling for the meat, and in a tin plate we get onions and mushrooms and butter which turn out to be a fantastic side dish. I also love potatoes so we’ll use the BBQ again to make some baked and then have a big bowl of mashed on the table as well. Now, I’m not a huge veggie guy, but I would like to have some sweet corn on the side. The table gets topped off with dinner rolls, gravy, BBQ sauce, honey, butter, salt and pepper.
I love me some dessert, so there’s got to be something sweet at the end of the meal. Probably downstairs by the pool table and the bar. I love some Cherry Cheesecake, and Chocolate Cake, and ice cream too. Fresh Cheesecake with some cherry topping added right before we eat, then a cake that melts in your mouth and ice cream just because it’s the way to go.
With the food taken care of the only thing left is really the conversation. I have a movie maker, a music maker, a dude who gets to meet a lot of the sports celebs I’d like to meet, an actress I kind of have a crush on and a former President of the United States. We could talk about the Middle East, celebrity legends, current media darlings, the amenities available at the White House, Dollywood, Comics, Star Wars, and all things in between.
I know that the whole thing is far fetched and about 99.9% unlikely to happen, but it was fun to plan. We’re less than 1,000 words in here and already I’ve picked the guests, menu and even some conversation topics. How could this not be fun?
Let’s break it down.
Honoured Guests
Kristen Bell
Bill Clinton
Dolly Parton
Cabral Richards
Kevin Smith
Menu
Appetizers
Assorted Platter of Pickles: Dill, Sweet and Sour, Butter.
Cheese Plate w/ Crackers: Cheddar, Swiss, Brie, Havarti.
Bacon and such 1: Water Chestnuts wrapped in Bacon.
Bacon and such 2: Scallops wrapped in Bacon.
Main Course
Grilled Chicken legs.
Grilled Triple A Alberta Beef Steaks.
Grill Baked Potatoes.
Mashed Potatoes.
Grill Fried Onions and Mushrooms.
Fresh Kernelled Corn.
Dinner Rolls.
Gravy (chicken and beef).
Assorted table condiments.
Dessert
Cherry Cheesecake.
Chocolate Cake.
Ice Cream.
Beverages
Assorted Beer: Molson Stock Ale, Corona, Heineken, etc.
Wine: White and Red available.
Hard Liquors: Rum (white, amber, dark), Vodka, Whiskey (Canadian Club, Crown Royal).
So there you have it. My plans for an evening that will probably never happen, except for the 0.01% chance that we left earlier.
Wish a dude luck.
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